I’ve been obsessed with birth since I was five years old, sparked by a TV birth scene that moved me to tears (happy tears, I promise). After that, I became a self-appointed, pint-sized midwife. I was constantly pretending that my Barbie dolls, my cousin, or myself were pregnant and giving birth. And of course, I insisted on delivering the baby. No one was safe from my prenatal care, and I was always quick to correct anyone who still thought the stork brought babies. Goodness, my mom and aunt must have found themselves laughing or deeply embarrassed so many times by my antics!

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Unfortunately, the birth of my first child was filled with trauma and obstetrical violence for both my baby and me. A far cry from the natural birth I had envisioned during pregnancy. During my third pregnancy, seven years later, I was with an obstetrical practice that had 19 different doctors within it. The possibility of having a stranger attend my birth was very disconcerting for me. I still remember the relief I felt when the doctor who cared for me during my miscarriage walked into the hospital triage room while I was in labor. I had this unconscious, yet strangely palpable thought, "I know him. I can have my baby now." This birth was far better than my first birth but, unfortunately, it was still traumatic in many ways. After her birth, I learned about doulas and the continuity of care that they can provide for families. The concept really intrigued me. I realized that was what I had been subconsciously searching for during my births and my miscarriage, and that I had already begun informally providing that type of labor support for friends and family. After this birth, I discovered complementary medicine and regained a sense of autonomy regarding my family's and my health long before aromatherapy and clean eating were a thing. 

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I will always be grateful to my midwives at Special Beginnings Birth Center for the holistic approach to maternity care they provided me during my fourth pregnancy. My healing began when my midwife, Suzanne, asked me to tell her about my previous birth experiences. As I shared what happened, she stopped me and said, "Michelle, that must have been so incredibly traumatic for you both." I looked up at her and began crying. No one had ever voiced or acknowledged the trauma and birth violence we had endured. There had never been any thought or discussion beyond the goal that a healthy mom and a healthy baby are all that matters. You were just expected to be grateful for that. Any possibility of birth trauma was not considered. This birth, my baby and I experienced a beautiful, peaceful birth with the help of my student doula and my midwife, Sandy. I had no idea at the time that I would one day work for Sandy at Special Beginnings as a midwifery birth assistant.

 

Eighteen months later, in 2000, I began my certification training as a childbirth assistant. My childhood dream was becoming a reality! Shortly into my career, I had a few doula clients remark during their births, "This was my worst fear realized."  I sought out a way to help clients release their fears so they would not manifest during their births. I also wanted to provide them with powerful tools to achieve the natural birth they so often desired, and which our bodies are intrinsically designed to do.

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I was already familiar with the benefits of hypnosis, and I began researching different birth hypnosis methods. I found Winifred Conkling's Hypnosis for a Joyful Pregnancy and Pain-Free Labor and Delivery. This book led me to become certified as a HypnoBirthing® Practitioner in 2003. During the training, I knew deep in my soul that this was what I was meant to do. I was then blessed to certify as a Hypnobabies® Instructor in 2004. 

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As I have grown as a birth professional, I have thoughtfully chosen to no longer re-certify each year or be affiliated with neither the Hypnobabies® Network nor the HypnoBirthing® Institute. Both programs are excellent. I sincerely admire the founder of each method. I am grateful for all they have taught me and all they have done to advance the field of hypnosis and normalize natural birth. I simply feel uncomfortable being forced into an alliance with either brand to the exclusion of all others. I also wanted the autonomy to fully meet the needs of my birthing clients and to create recordings in my own voice for them. As a birth and clinical hypnosis specialist and inclusive independent educator, I tailor my instruction and skills to reflect the needs of each family I work with. (And, I promise I have never made my clients quack like a duck or made someone do something against their will while in hypnosis, nor would I want to. But if that were possible, my kids would happily clean their rooms and cook dinner while shaking their tail feathers.) 

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Understanding that not everyone is comfortable with the idea of hypnosis, I developed my guided relaxation childbirth program, The Birth Ease Method, in 2004. Unlike childbirth hypnosis programs that focus primarily on creating a pain-free birth, my childbirth course is designed for all parents looking to create a more relaxed pregnancy and gentler birth experience. And while it can definitely help you achieve a natural, unmedicated birth, I feel strongly that all parents and their babies benefit from stress-reduction techniques and relaxation skills, especially those they can carry into parenthood. 

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In 2008, I welcomed my last baby, completing the birthplace trifecta: hospital, birth center, and home waterbirth. I always tease that I made the mistake of praying that experience would make me a better doula and childbirth educator. As they say, be careful what you pray for because my youngest and that birth delivered. Experience is the best teacher, and while I joke about it, I am grateful. My midwives were amazing, and my birth was empowering in many ways. But the experience renewed my dedication to understanding the impacts of trauma on perinatal health and supporting clients who are considered advanced maternal age or a "geriatric pregnancy" like me. (Who comes up with these horrendous terms and thinks they are okay?) My youngest continues to teach me and has spurred my commitment to learning more about neurodiversity and neuro-affirming care, and to train in supporting neurodivergent birth.

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Over the years, as I worked with couples who had lost previous pregnancies and were now often tentatively celebrating another pregnancy, I understood their mixture of joy and fear. In my sincere desire to more fully support families through perinatal grief and loss, I have trained extensively with Stillbirthday University, Resolve Through Sharing Bereavement Services, The Institute for the Study of Birth, Breath, & Death, PESI, and other reputable organizations. I am honored to be a Certified Grief Educator with David Kessler and Grief.com, a Grief Care Professional with Megan Devine, and a teacher for The Institute for the Study of Birth, Breath, & Death.

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​As I have worked individually with hundreds of families over the years, I have found that everyone's life experiences, needs, and situations are unique in their journey to parenthood. As I continue to train and certify, I am grateful to be a Certified Body Ready Method® Pro, Advanced Certified VBAC Doula, and MEGI High Risk Doula. I am excited to see where my love of learning and my commitment to providing trauma-informed, inclusive, and neuro-affirming care take me. Because these days, I’m doing my best to provide my clients with better support than I did back when I was shouting 'Push!' at my poor cousin and providing unsolicited childbirth education to my childhood playmates.

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